Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Dispatches From Self-Care-Land

First, an update: Our trial has been postponed. There is some suspicion about what the city is up to, which I'm not sure I can talk about here, so won't. At first I was mad...all this ramping up all week long has taken a lot of energy I could have put elsewhere. But, in the long run it may be better. The "new" trial date -- still to be approved -- would be the day before the quarter ends, so rather than get behind and then try to catch up just in time for finals, this way I can just pretend the quarter ends two days earlier and get stuff done by then.

Also, it gives us more time to meet with our lawyer team (we have two good ones) rather than trying to exhaustingly cram all weekend. So that's good.

The other good thing is that I get to keep on practicing how to ask for and receive (and do for myself) good self-care, which appears to be an important theme in my life right now. That way I'll be all practiced up and ready for when the trial starts.

Here are some of the things I've done:
  • Relinquished school communication responsibilities for the trial and related activities (prior to and during the first trial I emailed the school regularly and texted constantly during it).
  • Sent JT a list of things my cielo and I need that will help, like lunches during the trial, prayer gatherings, and other stuff.
  • Accepted JT's invitation to drive us every day, even though I feel more in control when I drive.
  • Asked a school friend to meet for spiritual direction.
  • Asked another school friend who is a massage therapist and Reiki worker for some body work.
  • Asked the church to pray for me.
  • Checked in with my therapist.
  • Told BearGoddess and BlueEyes and JT that I need to hear from them every day, even if it's just a note.
  • Decided not to do any of the reading for this week's classes (I had enough with papers and trial prep).
  • Tonight when I got the news of the change, I called JT, told her what happened, and admitted I didn't know what to do about tomorrow's prayer gathering at school. She said she'd think of something and when we talked again and decided to postpone the gathering, I asked if she would take care of it. Which she did beautifully.
  • Asked BlueEyes to come over to the house yesterday. The four defenders met in our living room to view video and talk strategy, and I wanted to cleanse out whatever icky energy was brought in by the videos. She came, we watched an episode of the Vicar of Dibley and ate brie, then I decided I wanted her to go for a walk with me so we did, and then we decided to go get ice cream. Quite delightful. I was worried that I would not sleep well because of watching the videos (still hard 6 months later), but I slept well and woke up chipper.
I think this self-care stuff just might work...

Thanks, everyone, for your kind comments here and for your prayers. It means a lot to me, and I think there is something quite wonderful and powerful that folks -- many of whom I've never met -- all across this continent and across the pond, are thinking of me and the group and keeping us in your prayers.

Thank you, and peace.

2 comments:

  1. Ack! I know you weren't looking forward to the trail, but postponing it stinks, too, in a different sort of now you have to roller coaster it again way.

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  2. We'll just keep on praying, as long as it takes. You are doing all the right stuff. Sending hugs.

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